Hope is not denying what is happening to you right now,  it is the ability to use what is happening to you right now in order to suffer less.  Running away won't take it away.  Instead, trust your strength and goodness.  Cultivate a practice of inner strength by turning to the habits that will make you stronger not weaker.  Know that darkness doesn't mean death.  Darkness can be filled with richness and growth if you know how to use everything that happens to you as nourishment for growth.  Learn to meditate and talk openly and honestly to yourself and others.  Stop hiding behind perfectionism.  It doesn't exist.   You exist just as you are right now and that is enough.

"It may be when we no longer know what to do,

we have come to our real work,

and that when we no longer know which way to go,

we have begun our real journey."

-Wendell Berry